After being shoved into prison, we were all commanded to strip. In a moment of hesitation, the warders mysteriously detected rudeness and practiced their martial arts on us. It is a lady who chose to discipline me! She slapped me severally as her occasional kicks fell on my genitals. Well, I managed to lose all my clothes. When she finally stopped beating me, her eyes were fixed on one part of my body. She grinned as she scrutinized me. She took her baton and stroked me and laughed hysterically. Soon, she was joined by her colleagues who gathered around to see what she had discovered for the first time in her life…those who have served jail sentences will tell you that humiliation starts at the check point. It is in the interest of the prison department to prevent anyone from sneaking anything into prison. There are only two known ways of sneaking money and drugs into prison; the jungle technique and the mouth trick.

The Jungle technique

For almost a century, the prison warders and the CID were unable to unravel how money and drugs are sneaked into prison cells. To carry out this dirty trick, you will need two people. One(soon to be convicted) and an helper. You must then squeeze together money or drugs and make them as small as possible and wrap them in a polythene paper bag. This should be as small as possible. The helper will thus tie a small thread and push the polythene into the rectum of the soon to be convict. I saw the reality of this technique when the warders started checking us.

Standing in a long queue, I noticed that Charlo was walking strangely, since he was just in front of me. Soon, his turn to be checked came and he was called to stand a side. It was day time but, the warder switched on his touch and started the inspection. He went through Charlo’s front side and when he turned to check his back, he wore white gloves. He slapped Charlo on the back and shouted “Bend, I am going in!” He must have been a brave man. I cannot even think of looking at the rear side of a full grown up man. This warder even checked Charlo’s exhaust…that is just too much. All went through peacefully. He was about to send Charlo away when he shouted “wait!” I am hairy and so, I assume all men are. That is why the jungle technique worked for centuries except today.

The warder discovered a strange thread at the exhaust of Charlo. He was now looking closely and keenly. In the moment of panic or as planned, Charlo released the loudest fart that pushed the warder 3 miles back. The warders fell on him with their batons and almost killed him. Afterwards, when he bent again, the warder pulled the thread at once and by force. Charlo fainted!

The mouth trick

This part was played by Stano. He had swallowed a bundle of well wrapped notes and left a thread lodged in his teeth. It would be pulled as soon as he was in prison, and he could have his money back. Apparently, this was his fourth time in prison! When the warder saw the thread, he called for a plies. Stano lost two teeth and his money.

I never waited to be humiliated like the other convicts. I just punched one of the prison warders and waited to be beaten to death. I woke up 3 weeks later in a hospital; chained to the bed.

Didn’t have a chance to read PART I click here 



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